Trust me, I didn’t want to fight with my boyfriend but our relationship was changing because of the baby to come. We were in preparation for not just our lives changing but us as people too.
Your relationship with your significant other is going to change. It will be fun and challenging but it will be for the best. It will be for the baby.
Pregnancy is hard on it’s own.
You’re physically and mentally changing. You watch your body literally grow a whole child on the inside. If that isn’t mind blowing to anyone that I don’t know what! We as woman grow freaking humans. My pregnancy was mind-blowing to me everyday. I would literally wake up and be like, oh snap I am freaking pregnant.
Your hormonal. My hormones were on high. I am naturally like a sour patch. I am sour and sweet. Pregnancy took on the life of both but especially my sourness. My hormones had me running on 10 different emotions all the time.
All these things made me emotional. I would cry over all kinds of things from work bull to little things my boyfriend, Pop did to annoy me. Then I would be happy at eating a good meal and sad at movies on tv.
I say all this to say:
Because pregnancy is already hard on it’s own, it can make other things hard as well.
If I’m emotional, my emotions affect my conversation with Pop. It effects my mood and what I want to eat or do. My emotions effect everything.
It also affects your level of understanding. Well maybe not everybody lol but it effected mine. I didn’t always want to be reasonable while I was pregnant because shoot I was milking some of this. My response for everything was: I’m pregnant come on! Sometimes I wanted to just be upset and not understand his side on things. Other times, I couldn’t find my head to level it to understand where he was coming from. I was loosing it for a moment because I was hungry, lol.
I love my boyfriend, Pop and he loves me.
We’ve been together 5 years before our little Pudding came along. So this wasn’t a basic relationship. It was well established before our son came along. But we weren’t prepared for everything that came with pregnancy. We weren’t prepared for the emotional ride.
We would argue about little things that really could have been avoided. Like about baby things, what to put on the registry. Like come one that’s not something to argue about. But then the next moment we would be okay and sit down to watch a movie. But this was our pregnancy period.
There were moments when I would be so emotional I would question if we were really ready to do this. I would think were arguing way too much, how could we be ready to have a kid. This is how crazy tough all this was. Sometimes I even questioned if we were connecting as a couple and what that could do for our child if we didn’t work on us before our kid came.
There were times I would feel alone for whatever reason and we would get in an argument about if he was on my side or my team. Sometimes pregnancy can make you feel like it’s you against the world and all you want is for your significant other to ignore if you were wrong or not about something and just be on your side. This stuff was so crazy. My boyfriend that I had been with for 5 years, I was questioning if he was on my team. This was madness.
Pregnancy can make you crazy but it also can put things into perspective. Share on XHis perspective.
From his point he really did try to be understanding of everything I was going through. Obviously a man can’t be pregnant but he really did try to understand as much as he could. He always tried to be on my side and hold my hand through everything. Even when I was upset and loosing it over little things. He tried to just take it all in.
He took the blame for many things, definitely for more things than he should have. But again he was trying to understand what I was going through as sour pregnant lady.
For example, when it came to our baby shower planning, he took on the main role of helping my aunt plan everything. He literally didn’t want me to be stressed about anything throughout my pregnancy that he was willing to be a baby shower planner. Ladies if you need help with baby shower planning, I know a guy that’s not too bad lol. Look at this man, right!
When we started he didn’t have much baby knowledge. In his family, there is only a small group of younger kids that he grew up with and they were all around the same age. His brother was only born 3 years after him, so he didn’t help out much in that area. But he was willing to learn from day one. Including how to work with me on my bad days during my pregnancy. He was/is a champion!
My pregnancy brought out a lot about ourselves.
We learned how we wanted to be as parents. We learned the kind of people we wanted to be to each other. It made us even more of a team before the baby. It also helped us to learn some things we wanted to change about ourselves. We didn’t learn everything but we learned a lot of things. At the end of the day, Pop is my best friend and I couldn’t ask for anyone else to go through this experience with.
Every relationship will be different but here are some ways that might help you get ahead of the relationship changes.
8 Ways to Get Through Pregnancy Relationship Changes
- Be Honest About your Thoughts & Feelings: Although this may be hard its better to start off with honesty. You don’t want anything to build up and blow up because you weren’t honest about how it made you both feel. Honesty also helps you both with working things out.
- Be Open to Learning: This experience will help you learn new things about yourself and each other but only if your open to learning. You will learn good and bad things but as long as your open to learning you can also be open to working on these things.
- Listen First: It is hard to hear when you’re talking. Try with all your might to listen first. Sometimes in the heat of things we don’t always listen and it can affect our reactions and responses. Listening first till the other person can get through their thought can save you in the end.
- Learn to Let It Go: The power of letting go can be amazing. Once the dust settles let go of what made you both upset, sad, or anything that wasn’t happiness. Just let it go. Learn from it but don’t hold on it to. Also, don’t bring it back up again. Once you let it go, you have to completely release it from the relationship.
- Live in the Moment: Pregnancy is a moment. It is only 9-10 months. This means that it will pass. So why not live in this moment. This will be the only time that you two as a couple will only be you two so why not enjoy living in the moment. Focus on happiness and what will make you both happy in this time.
- Make Happiness Your Inspiration/Motivation: Try to always choose happiness. It will make you feel better when you look at back on the experience. When you choose happiness you can wash away the bad parts about this period.
- Enjoy this Process Together: Why not enjoy this process. When you incorporate all the things above you can truly enjoy this process. It will decrease the stress and increase the happiness.
- Choose Love: You’re together for a reason. Choose Love. Bring this baby into the world under one of the greatest feelings, love!
For the Win (conclusion)
Although we didn’t know the things above in the beginning, we learned them along the way. Putting these tips into effect really made a change in our relationship. We didn’t always get it right but when we did it made our relationship much better in the end.
